Domestic violence is a pattern of many behaviors directed at achieving and maintaining power and control over an intimate partner. Power and control tactics certainly include acts of physical violence of varying degrees of severity. However, in many abusive relationships, abusers use a variety of other tactics directed at controlling their partners. In the 1980s, The Domestic Abuse Intervention Project in Duluth, Minnesota developed a model to help explain and characterize abusive relationships. This model is called the Power and Control Wheel [we could try to get permission to have a link to a power and control wheel on the website] and explains the following tactics used by abusers:

The Wheel of Power and Control

This information is from the Duluth, Minnesota Domestic Violence Program.

Using intimidation: making her afraid by using looks, actions, gestures, smashing things, destroying her property, abusing pets, displaying weapons.

Using emotional abuse: putting her down, making her feel bad about herself, calling her names, making her think she's crazy, playing mind games, humiliating her, making her feel guilty.

Using isolation: controlling what she does, who she sees and talks to, what she reads, where she goes, limiting her outside involvement, using jealousy to justify actions.

Minimizing, denying, and blaming: making light of the abuse and not taking her concerns about it seriously, saying the abuse didn't happen, shifting responsibility for abusive behavior, saying she caused it.

Using children: making her feel guilty about the children, using the children to relay messages, using visitation to harass her, threatening to take children away.

Using male privilege: treating her like a servant, making all the big decisions, acting like the "master of the castle", being the one to define men's and women's roles.

Using economic abuse: preventing her from getting or keeping a job, making her ask for money, giving her an allowance, taking her money, not letting her know about or have access to family income.

Using coercion and threats: making and/or carrying out threats to hurt her, threatening to leave her, to commit suicide, to report her to welfare, making her drop charges, making her do illegal things.

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